… OR the key to understanding men
Last time I told you the story of Chris and Kim’s and “How to Reject a Man…The Wrong way”
UPDATE: Chris begged to take me for drinks and get my advice.
I won’t bore you with the details but it turns out she is still actively playing the field & keeping her options open with an active profile on a popular dating site plus some suspect facebook flirting. He confronted her about it with some facts – she lied to his face. Big blow-out. They broke up.
My response, “Look Chris, maybe she’s just not into you as much as you are into her. I know you want to believe otherwise but your gut instinct told you she wasn’t trustworthy and now you have proof. I know you feel for her but she did you a favour – move on. ”
Well guess what – they’re back together again! Want to know why?
He told me, “Well, I DO have feelings for her and the sex is way too good.”
To summarize…
1) He is more committed to her than she is to him.
2) She lied to him about something BIG
3) He is a doormat
Why?
What is the lesson you need to understand about men? You can get away with almost anything…if the sex is amazing together.
Ask yourself ‘How amazing and passionate is your sex life?’
Telling like it is,
The Alpha Male
PS: This is NOT implying or encouraging cheating OR being unfaithful. If you didn’t get the point – backup and read it again – slower!
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Wow…
The downside to that situation is that what’s sauce for the goose is also sauce for the gander. Great sex as a license to cheat? Nah, not for me.
But I will admit that great sex certainly makes a guy lots easier to get along with.
Lisa, try not to read too much into anything.
This was a story to illustrate that great sex will get him wrapped around your little finger. Obviously this is an extreme case. ( I never said she cheated – I said she ‘lied’)
NOT have great sex SO you can get free will to cheat. Come on!
that’s something definitely worth knowing
lol
Now i know why he wont leave
My husband did that, it hurts horribly. Had it not been that 1) nothing happened as in no one was met, 2) we had not had 15 years under our belts 3) have 5 kids together and 4) a willingness to work through it on both ends, he would have hit the curb.
I see my part in it , not realizing that I was putting myself and school above him, that is the fundemental underlying reason that ultimitly we are still together.
If we were just dating, huh, gone!
psst, notice nothing I said about us working through it had anything to do with great sex?
I love this story cuz hidden in it is a wonderfull secret most women dont know. IT’S [sex] a way men are able to give and recieve forgiveness involving most tresspasses and plain ol’ character flaws , annoying behaviors, ect . Cheating seems to be the main exclusion as there are very few exclusions to this…
P.S: Lisa needs to read s l o w e r…Cheaters should realize they are realy cheating themself.
Makes you ask….
what has happened to the good old “I love you for who you are, NOT how ‘hard’ you can get me?
what if the situation is reversed?
I have been in exactly the same situation except i took HIM back because i still have feelings for him and the sex is awesome…is there anyway to turn him round?
Liv
Thanks J
This just confirms two things:
1) what I always say about women who “punish” their men by withholding sex – they’re crazy
and
2) why I practice practice practice, work it work it work it and love it love it love it….
Signed
Iloveexwithmybigdaddyanytime….(and not to get away with anything….just good orgasms).
This article makes no sense. My ex and I are in the middle of a divorce and the sex was definately GREAT. But he cheated on me with a 250lb woman. I’m sorry, sex is not everything. When he tried to get me to forgive him I told him I wanted a divorce. Did I mention that I’d just had his kid? Sex definately doesn’t give anyone a free pass on certain things. Especially on cheating. You were at least right about that.
Christina, sorry to hear about your cheating man.
Another possibility is that he is a complete asshole or crazy. Neither excuses his behavior.
Jay Archer
I edited my first comment because I signed “loveEX” ….instead of “LoveSEX”….don’t want confusion and am not running to any exes.
Thanks J
This just confirms two things:
1) what I always say about women who “punish” their men by withholding sex – they’re crazy
and
2) why I practice practice practice, work it work it work it and love it love it love it….
Signed
IloveSexWithMyBigDaddyAnytime….(and not to get away with anything….just good orgasms).
My husband recently told me about this (not concerning me, but about someone else in an unhealthy relationship who is staying because the sex is great). If my husband said it, and Jay said it, then it must be true!
What is definitely true, is that men and women are wired differently. Sex is very important to men. I recently read a book in which the author (a female) states that if women could experience sex the way men do, we would want it all the time too. She went so far as to say men can become extremely unhappy (even to the point of feeling that life is worthless) without sex in their lives. Reading that, made me feel a certain empathy and understanding for and about men.
Belle, great comment on how men and women are ‘wired differently.’
Who was the author?
Jay
I agree with Belle!…
Let’s face it, sex is a form of communication for both men AND women. However, it just so happens that men are “hard wired” for sex (no pun intended). This is the way I have come to know how most men communicate with us as women on their deepest and most intimate level. And in most cases I say how lucky for us girls! What a wonderful way to communicate with someone! :~) So it only makes sense that a woman who “speaks a man’s language” sexually will be hard (there’s that word again) to let go of that easily. The man I have loved has shared far more with me through sexual intimacy than he ever has with mere words.
Women are complicated. Men not so much. I have had many men tell me this. Like Belle said men and women are wired differently. I choose to celebrate that difference as well as our similarities.
Bang on, Belle and Cat! Congrats – if there was a certificate or plaque for ‘getting it’ you’d get one.
Archer
“How To Satisfy A Man Every Time…and have him beg for more! ”
by Naura Hayden (1999).
*The only thing I didn’t like about the book, were her references to the sex lives of celebrities. She made a lot speculations about their sex lives.
Christina– not that your ex isn’t a schmuck… but I’m pretty sure just because your husband slept with a woman who is 250lbs that doesn’t just automatically mean the sex was lousy. At all actually. Stop using that for justification, maybe?