Q: I can cum easily when I masturbate but I can’t seem to cum with my partner. Can you help me?
Jay Archer: I’ve invited Masturbation Coach Wendy R Fuller to answer this question.
Wendy’s Answer: Great question! Here’s my initial suggestion…
When you are being intimate and enjoying sex with your partner take a quick inventory of yourself. Notice if there is somewhere in your body that you are blocked, stuck or tight.
If you notice tightness or become aware of a blockage put your hand on that spot and breathe into it. You might want to ask your partner to put his hand there as well. While you breathe say this; I give my body permission to let go. Also, during partner sex notice what kinds of thoughts you are having in your great big useless sex organ…your brain.
“Maybe, he is tired, this isn’t going to work, what if he cums to quickly, should I fake it?, what is wrong with me?”
These thoughts could be anything. They are in your way and not going to support you to reach the glorious joy of letting go against the penis of the man you love.
Next time you are having sex, make sure you have a voice, great sounds of pleasure. That will open up your body to loving energy. Take away the pressure to cum and enjoy rather PLEASURE. Go after as much pleasure as you can. Change the voice in your head to, I am free to let go. I am open to receiving as much pleasure as is possible to receive. I give myself permission to let go. I am safe. I love myself.
Finally, help yourself along. During intercourse reach your hand down and massage your clit just the way you like it. This is erotic and a turn on for your man as well. Remember, you and your man are in this together.
Over coffee, a glass of wine, driving in the car, talk to him about what is bothering you. This is an ‘us’ issue not you alone needing to fix yourself as if something is wrong with you. Ride the wave of pleasure and let yourself go. You deserve it!
Wendy R Fuller
– Sex Expert and Masturbation Coach
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