Act Like a Lady Think Like a Man – Book Summary

It’s hard not to like Steve Harvey – he’s a funny comedian, an alpha male and gives bang on advice to women.

OK I’m going to do my best to summarize the ideas in Steve Harvey’s Act Like a Lady Think Like A Man in as few words possible.


What drives men?
To be a provider. The less he feels like a provider the less of a man he feels. A man has to be #1 or feel in charge of something.

Men’s love is different than women.
Don’t project your idea of love on him. Men show love differently by what Steve calls Professing, Providing and Protecting.

Three things he needs:
1. Support
2. Loyalty
3. The ‘cookie’ which is sex which is how men connect.
Without the above 3 your relationship will not survive or last long.

He wants to sleep with you. Duh!
Advice for single, unmarried women on the dating scene. Everything he says and does is designed to get you in bed. So:
– Set your ‘price’ or your standard.
If you want to get married set your price high
– Tell him what the ‘price’ is and see if he is willing to pay it

Note: ‘price’ is not money – it’s a measure of sating/courting time, respect, effort, romance, commitment, expectations etc

How men distinguish the marrying type of women
There are 2 Different types of women in mens eyes
1. Sport fish – catch and thenrelease them
2. Keepers
Which are you? Which do you want to be?

Beware Mamma’s Boys
– A wife should never be second to his mother
– if he is a mamma’s boy you need to tell him to become the man and protector of his woman and family that you need him to be

Why Men Cheat?
1. If he’s not getting it from you may go looking for it
2. He thinks he can get away with it
3. Hasnt become the man he wants to be yet
4. There’s always a willing woman – somewhere

Get Some Stabdards..
Or he won’t respect you. What do you stand for?

Strong Independent Women
– If you don’t need us and tell us that we can’t be fulfilled and we’ll walk away.
– Dont give up your success – be a lady and ALLOW him to be a man.

90-day Rule – If your looking for Mr. Right – hold out on sex

There are a few more handy sections like ‘Getting The Ring’  and ‘Questions to Ask Him’  – but I did my best to cover the most juicy topics for you.

Is ‘Act Like a Lady Think Like A Man‘ by Steve Harvey worth the read? Absolutely! Hey, I read it and I’m a guy.

As always – I love your feedback so keep it coming.

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19 responses to “Act Like a Lady Think Like a Man – Book Summary”

  1. Kaitlin says:

    I really like what this secion of the book you posted said. It is all completly true! I think I might get to book to read about more because I am all about reading and learning new things. I think this book will be benificial to my and my boyfriend of almost 3 years 🙂 I love the advice you have given about everything that has entered my inbox 🙂 keep um comin! 🙂

    • Archer says:

      Kaitlan, thanks for the comment and compliment. I try my best to give you information that will help your live life

  2. Candy says:

    I read it. I was surprised by the source of such great advice.

  3. lapo o says:

    Couple of questions :

    1. What are the characteristics of a ‘sport fish’ and that of ‘a keeper’?

    2. Where can I get this book from?

  4. Confused says:

    Hey Mr. Archer-

    I’ve been reading your emails for awhile now, and oddly enough, my mother recently told me to read this book. I’m currently in a relationship (my first long-term one) and I have a question for you. I read the book, and to be honest, it didn’t leave me with very much. I don’t really feel like I gained anything from it because I’m not exactly the target audience I think he was going for. I’m particularly interested in delving more into the “why men cheat” section. I’m about to move in with my boyfriend – we’ve only been together for 8 months – and we’re both pretty nervous. He’s a few years older than me, and has been in many more long-term relationships than I have (essentially, he’s been around the block). He’s never lived with a girlfriend before but has never wanted to until now. In fact, I was shocked when he asked me! So much so that I brushed it off until he asked again the next time. What my question is (and what the issue is) is that he has a wandering eye. He’s admitted to having cheated on one girlfriend in the past, but claims it was only because they stopped having sex (and for a guy like him, in a WAY I understand). Naturally, I’m scared to death of him cheating on me. And I think that he might be. I’m not going to delve into why or how I know, but why would a guy still want to live with his girlfriend if he was planning on cheating on her anyway? Wouldn’t that mean that he doesn’t see the relationship going anywhere? Is it just that, as is stated in the book, “he thinks he can get away with it”? If that’s the case, then what do I do? How do I change that dynamic in our relationship? If he doesn’t respect me, but apparently still loves me enough to move in with me, what’s my next move? How do I approach this situation?

    Thank you. Sincerely,

  5. Belle says:

    Thanks for the summary. For some reason, I’ve been avoiding this book (probably because I’m married). However, I think it’s wonderful and interesting that Steve Harvey is actually helping women in this way. I had even wondered if some men are upset with him for making women wiser. Another thing I find interesting, is that prior to his book, Steve had been promoting the book of one of his colleagues called: “If You Want Closure, Start With Your Legs”.

  6. Melly says:

    As always, you’re on point Archer. I scanned the book and the main points you pulled out were what struck me most.

  7. Rachel says:

    This Book is a Life Saver!!!
    I have been best friends with Tim since we were 5 years old.
    We he was my 1st boyfriend. I have loved him and only him my whole life & when we started dating i put my all into our relationship. After 3 years of being head over heals for him & engaged i found out he had been cheating on me the whole time…
    “Act Like a Lady Think Like a Man” told me it wasn’t my fault and told me why he did it.
    I gave him the Support, Loyalty & The ‘cookie in the right time frame,but “he hasn’t become the man he wants to be yet”, so it didn’t matter.
    He didn’t have the “Who he is” the “What he does” & “How much he makes”. No wonder he always faltered when it came to “Professing, Providing and Protecting”.
    Thanks to this book I have my sanity back and I understand men instead of writing them and love off my life forever.
    Lady’s if you have the mentality that I did about someone cheating on you, “What didn’t i do enough of, what could i do better or more of for him” Stop! Read this book and realize that it may or may not have been you.
    Thank you Steve Harvey I have my life back & I now that one day down the road I will find the 1 man that i can wholly and completely give myself to mind, body and soul.

  8. gal says:

    id real like to kno the questions to ask him. maybe they are the right questions that wont irritate or make him defensive. when a guy gets defensive it hard to tell whats the truth and whats not ya kno. but i agree wit alot of the points on here most definitly.. the mommas boy thing isnt always bad its about family first kinda and that is a good trait i think.

  9. Ty says:

    I purchased this book a couple weeks ago and scanned through it. It has some good advice so far and I will read it in it’s entirety in a few days.

  10. Kitty Kat says:

    I think that if your man really and truly loves a woman then if she does not wish to make love then he should wait! Women will always find out in the end if her man has cheated, and it won’t be a pretty sight! If a man cheats on a woman then it’s obvious he doesn’t love her as much as he says he does….. and it’s the same with women. I read somewhere, that normally when men leave their woman it’s to be with someone else, whereas when a woman leaves her man it’s for a different life due to her being unhappy!

  11. Lee says:

    Appreciate the book review man, but can you please put your articles though spell check before you publish them?
    Apart from that, it sounds pretty bang-on. Except I disagree with the ‘without sex the relationship will fail’ Me and my partner did not sleep together for over a year after getting together and it only got stronger and stronger. Justifying not being a man and sucking it up and being faithful and good to your woman with “We don’t have enough sex” is ridiculous, and, quite frankly, pathetic. I know I would find that unacceptable from anyone, let alone someone I was considering spending the rest of my life with. Sure, sex is really, really important, but it’s not everything!

  12. Kelvin Philip says:

    when can get this book from??? please advise

  13. Kelvin Philip says:

    I really love have a copy for my self because i listen to the story this morning on 9ja INFO and i really the story and advise on written in the story when hearing………… I want to have a copy so as to read and learn from it kindly get back ASAP..

  14. Liliiana Mendes says:

    I’m reading this book but i’m not finish yet. But it really good book

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